One of the many memorable quotes attributed to the great Yogi Berra is - "Nostalgia ain't what it used to be." [Actually, though it seems like and sounds like something Yogi would have said, the line is more accurately attributed originally to author, Peter De Vries, from his 1959 novel, "Tents of Wickedness". Of course, taking the words out of Yogi's mouth only serves to prove the truth of the saying.] For some reason, today, Thanksgiving Day, 2025 as I type this, something at least akin to nostalgia has been running around in my mind.
As most of you know, I spent nearly 31 years laboring in the vineyards of The Law before walking away 13 years ago to begin laboring full-time in the vineyards of The Lord. [You see what I did there...ah, never mind.] As a lawyer, my days were often filled with an obsession for "technicalities". Well, that's not the term that lawyers would use. We'd say we were searching for "precedent", or searching for "justice" as we "pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore" [to quote Edgar Allan Poe from "The Raven"] desperately trying to find something - anything we could use to win for our clients.
There's nothing wrong with this; it isn't cheating; it's simply making sure The Law is applied appropriately and correctly. Everyone should be in favor of this. The Courtrooms of America are sanctuaries, if you will, of Justice. They are places where only the Truth and The Law are allowed. There is no room for Grace in the Courtroom.
“Unfortunately, this understanding of how a Courtroom is supposed to operate will serve to set up a starry-eyed lawyer for bitter disappointment if, and when, a Judge, having perhaps reached his or her fill of the rigidity of The Law, decides that your, uhm, I mean “their” case is an instance in which the "technicalities" of The Law will take a back seat to Grace.
As I said, that was much of my professional life for 31 years. Now, that I’m a preacher, I'm working for an employer who is all about Grace, and I find this work so much more satisfying. Don't get me wrong - I can, and, unfortunately, more often than I wish, still do find myself searching for "technicalities", even though I know my employer is shaking His head at my continual reversion to my old way of doing business So, I often find myself having the opportunity to remind my congregation that I am a "recovering lawyer". Fortunately, my present employer's Grace covers, and keeps on covering, my mistakes and foolishness as I work for Him, for which I am thankful!
But today, the nostalgia of "technicalities" came to my mind as I was invited to celebrate Thanksgiving at the home and table of my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, along with my mother-in-law. This is now the fourth Thanksgiving since Renee's death - which, in itself, is both still unbelievable, and still threatening to derail my attempts to find much gratitude in my heart on this Day. But, as I thoroughly enjoyed the hospitality of my in-laws today, it finally occurred to me to wonder: Am I still their "in-law"? Are they still my "in-laws"? Has Renee's death ended that "in-law" relationship forever?
I suppose there are "technicalities" in The Law which provide the Legal answers to these questions - the answers required by Justice. I have not had the heart to search for the answers. If I had to guess, I would say that The Law would say that, technically, our status as "in-laws" ended when Renee took her last breath in my arms nearly four years ago. Thus, I should have no reasonable expectation that the benefits of this now legally sundered relationship should continue. There's nothing wrong with this; it isn't cheating; it's just making sure the Law is applied appropriately and correctly. [Isn't it strange how those same exact words - which sounded so pure and righteous in my head when I wrote them a few minutes ago regarding what should take place in our Courtrooms - now sound so cold and pitiless in my heart when they apply to relationships between people?]
But I believe my "in-laws" have decided that, in this instance, the "technicalities" of The Law will take a back seat to Grace. They are not going to let me go, no matter what The Law says. By doing this, they have, like God, chosen Grace over Law. And for that, even if so much else about my life makes this Day of Thanksgiving a difficult day, I will always give thanks.
Ambrose Ramsey | Pastor and Shepherd
